Agent Au

I had a dream that I was a double agent for the CIA where my old USAP boss was my CIA boss. I was a mole in an Asian mafia group disguised as a Buddhist monastery. It was thrilling until I woke up. I felt so stealthy.

Those Big Brown Eyes

I'm taking Nina to get spayed tomorrow and I am deathly worried. I know it's a normal procedure but she's so little...and frail...and afraid of strangers...what a horrible person I am for not feeding her breakfast and leaving her alone all day, drugged, cut up, with people she doesn't know. While she's gone her little whines are going to be echoing in my head.

Dear God, if I become a mother one day am I going to be one of those types that bundle up their children in 10 layers of clothing during the summer because I'm afraid they'll catch a cold?

Christmas Winner

My sister is the bestest. I got this gorgeous Cath Kidston-knockoff saddle bag and wallet from her for Christmas. It is the most beautifully patterned bag and I don't own anything like it. I am OBSESSED!



Sometimes the fake is better than the real. This pattern isn't available on their website right now.

Merry Christmas and happy 2011 everyone! Just put down everything for these two special occasions and celebrate it with the people who mean the most to you. You've made it through another year and undoubtedly said people have been by your side, making memories with you, supporting you, and making life worth living.

Neeners

Nina came down with a fever yesterday because I let her out in the rain too long while taking her out to do her business. I was worried to the point of tears yesterday when she lay there, barely moving a muscle. At times she would let out blood-curdling high-pitched whines, like she was in serious pain. I didn't know what was wrong with her. Contrast this with lively, playful, hyper Nina who rarely stops moving and jumping. I know it was super paranoia taking over, because through the night I kept thinking, what if she doesn't make it? What if she's a dead doggy by twilight? It was such a relief, after 4 hours of sleep, to wake up and see her moving her eyes around even if her body wasn't. At the vet's office the doctor gave her some antibodies and a checkup. I had no idea the physical vulnerability of this poor little pooch. I felt so guilty while at the same time being sad that this ordeal had put a dent in my wallet--meds and office visit cost 73 dollars! A costly oversight indeed...But the good news is Nina will most likely be ok. She looked and seemed better today, so hopefully this recovery continues apace.

Before one begins to jump to conclusions about me being certified neurotic, there probably is a logical, psychologically-rooted explanation for my excessive anxiety. At least this is what I think. I don't usually get so ahead of myself when it comes to other issues. At the root of the problem, it has to do with my numerous short-lived experiences with pets. I must have had 4 or 5 puppies and/or dogs, all who met a tragic end less than a month of us owning them. Lucky was sent away because my mom couldn't stand him nibbling her plants (which she values more dearly than pets). Mimi died of a disease genetically transmitted by her mother. Peanut was sent away for the same reason Lucky was. And then I had an adorable mixed terrier whose name I forget, but she slipped under the gate and was never to be seen again. I guess through all this, my mom is partially to blame. These experiences have traumatized me such that I am horribly afraid any roaming insect eaten or rapid-fire illness will claim Nina's life, or that an unnoticed crack somewhere will be her portal to escape. I'm delirious aren't I?

That's the last time I take Nina out when it's raining. Her well being trumps a perfect potty training regimen.

Time to Do More Sit Ups

I had a 1/12 slice of chocolate cake tonight equivalent to 530 calories. Oh mama!

(But it was worth it.)

Yet Another Failed State Institution

I found out that my aunt's husband has been having an affair. This is the second affair in our extended family. It makes me completely lose faith in the institution of marriage. I don't even want to entertain the thought of marriage if this is what it leads to...extramarital affairs...unhappiness, and messy divorces. Are human beings inclined to be monogamous for most of their lives? If so, then why so much cheating? I feel like being faithful is becoming something of an anomaly nowadays. Maybe being social creatures by habit, humans are not meant to exhibit monogamous tendencies. If man-made institutions were not in place to restrict our behavior, would we see many more explicit polygamous relationships?

I think it's totally possible to be committed to someone and not get married. The foundation of trust and devotion has to be there, and that's hard to achieve between two people. That's what so many marriages lack. People get married for the wrong reasons-- because they think they're in love, because they're impulsive, because they want someone to stay with them.

There's a recent New York Times article about civil unions in France that made me think about what it means to be committed to someone. Maybe civil unions are the way to go. You can reap the economic benefits that come with marriage, but it doesn't box you into a corner in case things don't work out in the long run. And then after a while, if you can picture spending the rest of your life with someone, marriage may be the ultimate step.
Civil Unions in France

Hibernation Continues

This just means every time I take Nina outside she's going to want to eat the worms lying around.

Just Saying

"When peace breaks out."
I've never quite understood that phrase. Doesn't it seem oxymoronic in a sense? Breaking out is something objects of chaos do. If peace was a person, he/she would probably...glide out.

I can't even put forth words after watching this. It's like a horrifying reminder of everything that is wrong and sick with the world right now.

http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/12/15/flogging-video-sparks-protest-in-sudan

What a privilege we have here to protest things we disagree with when that very simple action we take for granted is not even accorded to someone else in another part of the world simply because of their gender.

Richard Holbrooke: 1941-2010 | FP Passport

Richard Holbrooke: 1941-2010 | FP Passport

A pivotal figure in US foreign policy has passed away. May he rest in peace.

The Cat's Out of the Bag

Whoo, Wikileaks has now given me new source of information for research! But seriously, what do people expect? International politics is not a saintly game. You can call US foreign policy what you want--deceiving, hypocritical, corrupt--but no country escapes such accusations. This huge leak just confirms what any person with common sense has known all along.

Speak Softly and Share the Big Stick

“We have moved from the cold war era of bipolar reality through the brief bubble of sole superpower unilateral fantasy into a world of a new multipowered system which requires old-fashioned balance-of-power diplomacy,” Mr. Rothkopf said. The result, he said, may be that “all of a sudden, the old cobweb-infested State Department is more important than it’s been in many, many years.”
--David Rothkopf, author of Running the World: The Inside Story of the National Security Council and the Architects of American Power, in a recent New York Times article

I wonder what American society will be like if in our lifetime the authority of the most powerful country in the world dissolves. The what-says-what-goes attitude of the US has fostered a society of people who can afford to not preoccupy themselves with foreign affairs and be educated about global issues. Can we ordinary Americans afford to be ignorant about issues outside of our borders--issues that are integral to our country's welfare--the day we're no longer the hegemon of the pecking order? Two things might happen. One is that there will increasingly be a discord between what the American public wants, i.e. demands made on the domestic level, and what the US needs to do on the international front. It's undeniable that American unilateralism is being increasingly challenged, whether it's from push or pull factors. This could very well make multilateralism the most viable way of conducting diplomacy in the foreseeable future, especially if the US is looking to slow down the ability for unilateral decision-making by a few other unnamed rising powers in the world. So then what? What if the public doesn't enjoy this seemingly compromising way of the US managing international affairs, especially if it may adversely affect the economic and socio-political situation at home?
The other thing that might happen is it may compel a generation of Americans to become interested in international affairs. Maybe we'll start asking questions, become interested in world history, educate ourselves on what past and present US foreign policy has been..we'll start talking about these things and caring...and maybe then the local media won't relegate foreign affairs news to a 2 minute clip or a blurb. It'll be...a revolution! Probably? Maybe? Perhaps?

I'm devastated that the New York Times is going to require a paid subscription for its services next year. Where am I going to turn to for free, informative, unabashedly liberal-slanting news? I don't want to read things outside of my worldview--it's a highly discomfiting feeling.

Jumping on the Bandwagon

I have just discovered the many uses and features of a smartphone. This could be dangerous.

I Don't Like This

There are almost no classes for me to take next semester. In addition USC has canceled my school account because records have indicated I've graduated. What is this blasphemy?

Where am I?

For the past two days I've been waking up at 8 AM, which is good. Unfortunately it goes downhill from there because I'll pass out at 10 PM, wake up at 10 30 in an anxious fit thinking it might be 3 in the morning and I haven't brushed my teeth, and not be able to sleep again until 2 AM. This doesn't make sense, seeing as 10 PM here is 2 PM there.

Adjustment Costs

Back in LA, where...
I am no longer a pedestrian, but a driver
Space is no longer a luxury but a built-in feature
Shanghainese no longer punctuates the conversation around me
"Exotic" food like burritos are no longer a treasure hunt
I no longer have my bed to myself but instead have to share it


Meet Nina, a mini Pinscher. She is the smallest thing and I can easily pick her up with one hand. I researched the breed online and they are one of the most hyperactive, attention-seeking dogs out there. I don't think my mom did the research before deciding to adopt her from my uncle. My mom is also an elitist when it comes to dogs--she'll shun mutts from the shelter but oohs and aahs over Nina since she's purebred. So in the end, I didn't get to choose my pet, but this one is a handful so I think I'm good for now.

I finally had the meeting today I've been anticipating for...oh, about a year now. My announcement to quit has been made official, and it went over a lot better than I thought it would. The director was especially receptive, which I was pleasantly surprised about, because it's never easy breaking this kind of news to a program that has invested so much in you. What a relief--it really feels like a great burden has been lifted off my shoulders. A good indication that I made the right decision? But this also means I'm potentially working on a shorter deadline than I initially thought. I could be graduating in May, which is half a year from now. This puts something else on my mind...the prospects of being employed after everything is done and settled. Time to start job hunting now. Now...now...now...

Why is it so hard being an adult? I wish I was a child, or Nina, who plays around with chew toys all day and just snuggles up to nap in my sheets once she becomes tired.

Love the Chang

I'm sitting in the Chiang Mai airport right now waiting for our noon flight to Bangkok, where we will have a three hour layover before boarding another plane for Phuket. Everything was going smoothly until Valerie realized she left her phone at the hotel. So here I am, glancing at the security gate every few minutes hoping she'll come through those doors and make the 11 50 final boarding call. And then I mistakenly thought the checked baggage was under my name when it was under hers, so I had to pay an extra 428 baht (~14 USD) to check in our luggage. No worries, just one expensive Thai meal. Food here is so cheap and good. I can't get enough lemongrass, green curry, kow soi, and pineapple fried rice, not to mention staples like pad thai. All the situps I did were quickly undone. The beach better be ready for the extra pounds I've packed on.

Chiang Mai was such an awesome city. I wish we could have had an extra day or two there. Amazing wats, such lush greenery, and elephant trekking. The elephants were such majestic creatures. So intelligent, serene, gentle, yet playful. Valerie says it was a life-altering experience. It definitely has made me see elephants in a much different and respectful way.






Dodo enjoying his bath.


...and then giving me one.

I don't know why we're leaving beautiful Chiang Mai for possibly horrendous weather conditions in the South. If it rains the entire time I'll just be thinking about what we're missing out on.

UPDATE: The Valerie has arrived. Whew.

Same Same But Different

Every time I hear Thai being spoken I can't help but think it's a language I should understand. It sounds like an alternate form of Vietnamese. But then it's strange, because I don't understand a word of Vietnamese either.

Flooding going on in the South right now. The travel agent said Phuket and Phi Phi should be fine, but who knows? Valerie might have to save me from the torrential waves since I'm a weak swimmer.

Loving Thailand so far. The people are charming. Chiang Mai is a city of history and delights. Looking forward to our elephant trek tomorrow.

It's Over

The Expo ended yesterday without all the huzzah that had characterized the opening. It was quite anticlimatic. Except for maybe when our very last visitor walked through the pavilion doors.

A flurry of emotions right now churning inside and making my stomach queasy. Each time I come back to Shanghai it becomes harder to leave.

A Post on Gluttony

I had so much food at teppanyaki today I thought I was going to explode. All you can eat sashimi, meat/veggies/seafood, and drinks for 150 RMB are deadly. I'm going to miss it back at home. After I thought I couldn't eat anymore, we got mango dessert at 許留山 on the Pudong riverfront. Then I remembered it's ok because there's a separate compartment for dessert. My stomach and jeans didn't protest.

I already miss Shanghai.

Today was not a good day for 文明-ness

I visited the notoriously hard to get into Japan Pavilion today. It was a pretty good experience. The robot playing the violin was better than I thought it would be, though like all other pavilions here, I would not wait over half an hour for it. After that I decided to go pavilion hopping around the Asia area. Got in Malaysia (basically a huge tourism-promoting space) and Singapore. Did some picture taking at Saudi Arabia, India, New Zealand, and Indonesia. Speaking of which, I was turned away at their fast access lane for having an American credential. Talk about diplomatic friction.

The highlight of the day: I was sitting on the floor in the theater of the Singapore Pavilion when I felt something warm soaking through the side of my shirt and pants. I looked over and there was a kid, wee wee out, spraying an arc of urine on me. After that my desire to pavilion hop abruptly ended and I went home.

5 more working days. Exactly a week before Expo ends. Then Thailand. Then Hong Kong. Then back to the good ol' US of A. Can you believe it?

I AM TIRED

1.5 million people. The population of a small country, and expected number of visitors at the Expo tomorrow.

1 Million Visitors, Cute Babies, and 老朋友

Quick updates on what's happened since my last blog post:

The Expo hit a record high of 1 million visitors on Saturday, October 16. Check out the sudden spike on the graph.
http://en.expo2010.cn/yqkl/index.htm

Volunteered at an orphanage dedicated to cleft lip and palate babies today. It was a sobering and rewarding experience. Shanghai Healing Home, link below.
http://jamieweidner.squarespace.com/

Friend from home Henry is currently in town visiting. I am now using him to translate bits and pieces of Shanghai-nese I hear but cannot understand. Friend I met in Taiwan last year Sam also visited recently. It's always nice to see familiar faces.

Between collecting data at the Shanghai Library, planning my trip to Thailand, and thinking about how I already miss Shanghai, I wonder about the identity of this city post-Expo. Shanghai has been enmeshed in Expo-ness, figuratively and literally. How odd will it be for the average Shanghai-nese to see Haibao in every corner of your life--on the subway, in the alley you live, as a nicely shaped shrub around the city--on a daily basis one day, and have him be gone, erased, wiped out the next? The government gets things done quickly--pushing forth the retirement of Haibao and associated propaganda will probably not be an exception. And then the larger philosophical question: what happens to Shanghai post-Expo? The city has centered around planning and executing this tremendous event for years now, and now that it's coming to a close I feel like it's almost inevitable that the city remakes itself or goes through an identity crisis. Maybe I've gone a little too "native"; after all, a good part of the world doesn't care for or experience any impact of the Expo on their own lives. But Shanghai, revolving around Better City, Better Life, will now become ____________. Talk about a serious mad libs game.

Hodgepodge Update

So, JA China. Even though that event happened eons ago I am still obligated to blog about it since it's pretty important. Even though our kids didn't end up taking any awards home that day I was immensely proud of them. There was a portion of the event called a "green trade show" where teams had to market and try to sell as many products as possible to "clients" who walked around with pretend money. Our kids were ecstatic that they had received 11 orders. These three kids, around 11 and 12, who come from migrant families and have received nowhere close to the quality of education I had growing up, were able to confidently present their product to foreigners--CEO's, and English-only speakers. The team that won Best Sales Award ended up having something close to 26 orders, but if there was an award for sales pitch presentation, these kids would have taken the day.

I love you guys!

To be honest I don't know that the Green Innovation Challenge Event really helped in terms of encouraging kids to develop practical business ideas. I mean, obviously most of the products were unfeasible, so it's not like logistics were relevant at all. It definitely fostered a desire to be entrepreneurial and for young students to be creative thinkers. But at the end of the day reality wins out over idealism and it's really one big competition. Everyone, kids, teachers, and to an extent volunteers alike, all care very much about who emerges victorious. And that's how the real world is. The people with the best ideas, most charismatic personalities, the ability to persuade, those are the ones who will make their way to the top. I'm super happy that my group of kids didn't falter in the face of competition and carried themselves well. They definitely are equipped with the necessary foundation to be able to compete now and in the future. So what's the next volunteer event? Working for Habitat for Humanity, helping to build a house in Pinghu!

News media (except in China) is abuzz with Liu Xiaobo's recent Nobel Peace Prize Award. It's big international news right now, to anyone who cares. Except China. Most ordinary Chinese have no idea Liu is and what just happened, and they probably never will. In fact I found myself wondering how Liu himself even found out he had won the prize, given that he is sitting in a jail cell near Beijing somewhere, isolated from the rest of the world except for occasional visits from his wife. I came across a Globe and Mail article that looks at the issue in a broader context:
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/world/tiananmen-dream-dead-in-one-generation/article1160927/
How much longer will China develop economically before the lid pops off on the bottle titled 'political freedom'?

Three weeks. That's how long we have until the end of the Expo. And there are even less working days left. I'm gripped by a monumental carpe diem attitude right now. I want to do everything that is associated with Shanghai. I haven't even seen a good part of the Expo yet. I love the city, even as it has its flaws. Oftentimes the conversations I enjoy most with tourists are with the local Shanghainese. I wonder how it feels for them to see the pace at which their city has changed and developed. I met a guy here who lives in Tianzifang (田子坊). Imagine if your home was in a place like Universal Citywalk. Or any other place with thousands of tourists a day, walking past your front doorstep, milling around your house, trying to take pictures with you. I would hate it. It's almost as bad as an ant invasion.

I will end my post here for now with something fun and quirky I did in the past few days. Taking studio pictures in China/Taiwan is a must do. To commemorate my fleeting youth I partook in this aesthetics-whoring activity. Teehee. But seriously, when I become old I can show my grandchildren (if I have any) or even my children, that I was not always a wrinkly raisin. Ugh, aging. I'm shuddering just thinking about it.

Weirdest Encounter Ever

I went to People's Square yesterday in search of some wearable autumn clothes. The weather has taken a turn for the better. I never thought I would say this about rainy and gloomy weather since I am usually a sun-loving girl but it is definitely a better alternative than death by humidity. Anyway, I ran into the strangest pervert outside of Raffles City and I don't know why I talked to him for so long. I guess I found it entertaining. I was walking outside when a guy handed me a magazine in shrink wrap. I took it at first thinking it was free but my next reaction was that something probably had to come out of it so I immediately handed it back to him. It's free! he said. I looked skeptically at him and slowly took it back. He quickly finished.

You just have to register your name and then it's yours.

Before I could refuse his friend appeared and whisked me off. Where are we going? I kept asking him as we walked into an alley. Luckily I recognized where I was and there were people around so I wasn't worried about anything happening. I couldn't understand what he was saying but he asked me questions like where are you from? Are Americans really as open as Hollywood makes them out to be (after he found out where I was from)? How old are you? Then he told me I should get married in Shanghai and return to my roots. Do you want me to introduce you to someone? He has a really good job in the Shanghai government and he's an eligible bachelor! We finally ended up at this dimly lit facial spa on the second floor of a mall. Once I walked in I knew it was shady business so I immediately turned around and said BYE.

He proceeded to follow me out the door and said wait! I'll show you where the exit is. I told him since he had lied to me once there was no way I was listening to him again, but he did indeed lead me outside to where we came in. I thought that was the end of things but then he put his arm around my waist and asked me the weirdest thing I have ever been asked in my life.

Can we pretend to be a couple?

NO! What the hell?

Come on, it'll be fun.

Are you that desperate to have a girlfriend that you need to play pretend games?

You've never been with a Chinese guy right? You should try one out so you can compare.

By this point I was thoroughly entertained (and mildly creeped out) so I decided to see where it would go. Sometime before this exchange he also said I was pretty but had bad skin and he could show me where to go to fix it.

So we eventually made our way to Nanjing Dong Lu where along the way he kept trying to hold my arm and put his hand on my waist. I combated his attempts by moving and pushing his arm away. When we found a place to sit down we chatted a little. Highlights include him asking me if I ever had a one-night stand, and if I would like to have one with him, me asking him if he was gay because he talked quite effeminately, to which he responded no and showed me his normal talking voice (which did indeed sound like a straight guy), him describing his job as a bartender and being in movies with Nicholas Tse, sleeping with Carina Lau, and criticizing different parts of my body then immediately proceeding to tell me he could recommend me to a place that could resolve my "issues": gym for my stomach fat, salon for my dry hair, exercising my chest to acquire some cleavage, and so on. At the end he asked if we could kiss and I said no. He kept persisting and finally I got up to leave. He then settled with a hug but tried to cop a feel when we pulled back.
Through all this I should have been severely offended. I did find parts of it unbelievable. But generally I found it all very amusing. It was probably because I kept thinking he was gay even after he asserted he was not. That was just the vibe he gave me. It was a very long and useless solicitation on his behalf. He would have been cute if he wasn't such a 大色狼.

Wowza. Roughly T-1 month until the Expo ends. Where did the time go? I really am not ready to go back to life in the States...

A Tour of Europe

I finally had some time to visit other pavilions on the Pudong side, which I hadn’t done for a good while because of work and other stuff keeping me busy. I did a partial tour of some European pavilions until my legs decided they did not want to walk any longer. It was an enjoyable and insightful experience. Working in the same routine day after day, you obviously become used to the way things are run at your own pavilion. I was curious about how other pavilions run logistics at their venues and how it compared. I also tried to put myself in tourist shoes and compare the experiences of other pavilions with what goes on at the good ol’ US of A. Here is a brief recap of my impressions of the pavilions I visited today.

Russia Pavilion

Very Alice in Wonderland. Giant flowers, vegetables, and mushroom-like houses. It would be trippy if you were on something. On the first floor there were also displays of Russia’s nuclear fuel capabilities and current state-led developments in this issue area. Interesting but no coherent theme.

The Netherlands Pavilion

Otherwise known as Happy Street. The pavilion is outdoors and made to resemble a giant apartment with different living units—kitchen, living room, etc with scattered exhibits of random stuff, like a 3D image of a crystal dress and a floating rock. You had to peer through eye-sized holes for many of these exhibits. No coherent theme either.

The UK Pavilion



It looks exactly like the design concept image. Hands down my favorite pavilion tonight and in my opinion probably the most interesting one in the entire Expo, just because it completely fits in with the theme of sustainability and better environmental practices. It’s like the Doomsday seed vault, with each individual rod containing a different seed. But the reason I thought it was cool was because I didn’t have to wait in line. If I was a regular tourist and had to wait 3 hours to walk into a single room with no content inside except for the rods holding all the seeds I think I’d be pretty upset. There was nothing introducing the UK as a country. Sustainability and public diplomacy aren’t mutually exclusive.

France Pavilion

Beautiful and tastefully done, like the impression I have of the country. It made me want to visit even more. At the end there was a strange abstract performance with a Chinese lady prancing around with a Louis Vuitton bag with the company’s signature print in the background pouring imaginary diamonds into a trunk. The Chinese tourists ate it up. Way to fuel their frenzy to consume outrageously priced luxury goods.
*Insert shameless self-promotion here. An article I wrote for USC US-China Today a while back about luxury goods consumption in China.
http://www.uschina.usc.edu/article@usct?luxury_brands_focus_on_china_14057.aspx
I was also going to buy my friend some French tea until I realized each box was over 40 US dollars each. Then I put that shit down.

Germany Pavilion

Impressive. Large space, interactive features, and a good balance of national promotion and environmental sustainability. Pretty neat and dramatic “energy source” show at the end as well.

Spain Pavilion


Ok, sorry, but all I can remember about this pavilion is their GIANT CREEPY BABY. At the beginning there are bones hanging from the ceiling, you walk through giant screens introducing Spanish culture and lifestyle and then you come to a part where babies are saying “hola.” I thought that was cute until I ran into the baby. Its foot was bigger than me. It repetitively blinks and smiles painfully in slow motion while bubbles float and pop around it.

Not to sound cheesy but after visiting these pavilions I realized that the one thing the USA Pavilion has that the ones I visited don’t is human interaction. What we lack in technological sophistication we make up for with friendly bantering, offbeat joke-telling, and in some cases, amateur dancing. As a student ambassador it had been repeated to us that we were the “not-so-secret” weapon of the USA Pavilion but I dismissed it as something said to make us feel more important than we really are. I realized it’s pretty true…visitors may remember Spain for its giant creepy baby and Germany for its mesmerizing “energy source” performance, but for some who visited the USA Pavilion, they might just remember an entertaining conversation they had with an American in broken Chinese while waiting at the turnstiles...

Update post on JA China event to come soon!

My Mother's Messages

One thing I love about being abroad is that despite being thousands of miles away from home, I can still feel my mother's love. Instead of nagging and probing, it takes on the form of grammatically offensive and emoticon-filled emails. Different medium of expression, same abundance of affection.

Mon, Aug 9. 1.46 PM


Wed, Aug 11. 1.04 PM


Mon, Aug 30. 8.22 AM
*She titled this one 'Brandy's foot'.


I miss the parentals when I'm not talking to them, yet when I do I can't wait to get away from their incessant questions, especially my dad. When I help out with the cell phone game in Act III I look at all those middle aged people my parents' age and suddenly they don't seem so annoying anymore. I feel especially delighted when old ladies and men break into expressions of joy at the successful sending of a text message. I don't know if anyone feels that same sort of affinity to the Chinese tourists. Probably not, especially if you saw how aggressive and pushy these people are, but I'm weird. I really don't mind...the interactions are enjoyable.

No Words

5. That's the number of articles that come up in a New York Times news search when I type in 'Pakistan'. Pitiful. Embarrassed to admit it myself, I only vaguely remember a flood happening in some part of the world recently. But the floods that have hit Pakistan this time have left 20 million people homeless, 1 in 8 people being impacted. I didn't realize the magnitude of the disaster until I googled it myself. Even then coverage of it on news channels was nothing but sad. Donations have been paltry, not hitting half--actually not even one fourth--of the assistance that was given to Haiti. Are there so many of us now that the easiest thing to do when other fellow humans are suffering is to turn a blind eye? Or not even know that it happened?

Huffington Post blog on the Pakistan floods:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/parvez-ahmed/urgency-and-creativity-ne_b_706620.html

If pictures are worth a thousand words let this be a sobering reminder:
http://niceguycordero.tumblr.com/post/1093467526/karmahasutra-yes-those-babies-are-lying-on

Sadly I think the last time people genuinely felt the most compassion for each other was when we were still living in hunter-gatherer tribes and what was more important were our commonalities with one another, rather than our differences.

JA China

The other night I went to a Junior Achievers volunteer training session in preparation for the JA Green Innovation Challenge. What is this JA business all about, you may wonder. In short, JA stands for Junior Achievers, a global non-profit organization that focuses on helping elementary and junior-school age children foster skills applicable to the “real world” of business and finance. The idea is to bring learning beyond the classroom and encourage students from an early age to develop a set of creative and entrepreneurial practices that will carry on with them later in life.

The event in particular consists of a “Green Trade” fair and presentation that teams of local schoolchildren participate in. Each team invents a product and business plan to market said product. The goal is to create something that will be economically feasible to produce and sell, but to also have an environmentally conscious element to it. During the trade fair students will market their product to “buyers” (CEO’s or high level executives of sponsoring companies); essentially being salespeople for their product. During the presentation portion students provide a short and entertaining explanation—in commercial, song, speech, whatever format you might think of—about the various characteristics of their product. A third part gives team leaders, “little CEO’s,” an opportunity to meet with real CEO’s of sponsoring companies.

Our job as USAP volunteers is to serve as mentors to these students. We are supposed to provide suggestions and ideas on ways they can improve their product—especially when it comes to incorporating a “green” element into it, and also encourage them when it comes to pitching their product and speaking in front of an audience. Mentorship can also be as simple as coaching them on how to greet important people like CEO’s—things to say, tips on how to behave, and so on. It requires us to work closely with the teachers of the students because although they are an essential part of their education, we act as valuable (hopefully) supplements to the students’ learning experiences.


We had to come up with a visual representing the spirit of our team and present it to the rest of the group.

The JA training session was interesting. Basically, the idea that one would volunteer without expecting any benefits in return is still one that is slowly gaining ground in China. According to the JA rep, when the organization first established itself in China it was very difficult to convince administrators and teachers that JA wanted to become involved with students purely because of altruistic reasons. Many suspected JA was driven by motives to proselytize or gain economic profit. It was also a challenge getting people interested in volunteering.

I honestly didn’t anticipate having access to such a wealth of volunteer opportunities working at USAP. I volunteered at another event spending time with mistreated cats, and other people have participated in events working with migrant schoolchildren as well as kids with disabilities. In my opinion it’s a worthwhile way to spend some of your time off as well as see a side of Shanghai that isn’t necessarily paid attention to amidst all the chaos and buzz that is the Expo.


Combing cats. I’m usually more of a dog person but this event hit a soft spot.

All in all, I’m looking forward to meeting my students and seeing what creative ideas they’ve already come up with. It’s great being a child. There are no limits to imagination and possibilities. Maybe they’ll be a potent source of inspiration for me.

[Images courtesy of Rene Patnode]

Passing Time in the Storm

There's a storm warning today. The thunder sounds pretty scary. There might be a typhoon coming.

Yesterday I rode in a makeshift cab to Nanjing Dong Lu with some friends, you know, where there are some seats attached to a motorcycle. It was quite a scary experience. I thought we might die occasionally as we hit bumps in the road and drove so closely to real cabs but we made it.

I'm going to start doing some work for the Pudong Institute for the US Economy on my time off. The director is a PhD interested in US-China Relations and Economics so I'm hoping this will be a rewarding experience.

I can't believe it's the first day of September already. School has started in the States so I feel behind knowing I haven't done any of my work, in addition to knowing I've been here for over a month. I ended my rotation in Protocol and now am working in the trenches. I rather like it. I like Protocol too. It's two different crowds of people I'm dealing with, and both have their pros and cons. 各有所長.

I've decided I'm retiring from the pin trading business. The other day I coerced a volunteer into giving away one of his most precious limited-edition Barcelona lizard pins in addition to two of his other pins for my protocol pin and afterward he looked like he was about to cry. It wasn't a good feeling. I felt like a bully. Over some silly pins at that. So now I'm not trading anymore. I'm only going to take pins people give to me.

Being here in Shanghai, I've talked to a number of people about their viewpoints on general issues like politics, problems in society, the Expo, and so on. I don't know what to make of it. On one hand I feel like a lot of the younger folks I've talked to either don't care or are pretty brainwashed. One person told me he thinks the US invented GDP as a measure to lie to China about how best to achieve economic growth. There are other less sinister impressions people have given. Some people think the Expo is a waste of money and time, some people think it's great for China and its people. But who's actually speaking the truth is unfathomable. That's what happens when you talk to a society of people where the truth is dangerous to reveal.

They Make it Look so Romantic in the Movies

My sister's flight from Shanghai to Hong Kong was this morning at 9 00 AM. I got up and left my apartment at 7 50 thinking that would be enough time to get to the airport to see her off. NO. It wasn't. What ended up happening was me huffing and puffing up stairs and escalators to arrive at the departure terminal and discover (although I already knew when I got off the subway at 9 17) that her flight had taken off. Plus I was sweating a storm. How does the person in the movies and dramas always manage to narrowly catch their lover at the airport to confess their feelings or tell them not to leave? And look good doing it? URBAN MYTH!!!

Hypochondria

When you work with literally thousands of people each day it's only a matter of time before you get sick. I am no exception. It could be worse. Some friends have been sick since we've gotten here, some have even been in the hospital because of pneumonia. But I developed this nagging cough and semi-sore throat (feels more like a lump in my throat whenever I swallow) and then today in a matter of hours my left leg swelled up like a balloon due to--and I have narrowed it down to three probable causes--1) an allergic reaction to something, maybe cats I played with on Sunday (why do you think I am not a fan of felines?), 2) a severe reaction to mosquito bites (although I don't think this is likely since I've been bitten before and not experienced anything like this), or 3) bacteria developing from a pedicure I got in the Expo Village (I really hope this is not the case because I think I will throw up). O_o So which one is it? I just want to be healthy! Is that too much to ask for?

Seriously, I blame the aircon in the office. After 7 it becomes exponentially colder, and by the time 10 30 rolls around my brain is frozen so that I can't think anymore. I'm pretty sure other students have had health issues with the aircon as well. Maybe we can unite and demand it be turned down (or kept at an acceptable level).

Anyway, I hope I don't die. Being sick is an anomaly for me (thankfully) and so every time I feel slightly under the weather I can't help but make the situation more severe than it is. But if you saw my leg you'd probably tell me to go see a doctor. I'll post pictures on that later.

Pin Fetish

The last thing I would have imagined encountering here at the Expo is this fundamental craziness for pin collecting. For outsiders who may not understand the pin culture kicking and thriving between Expo employees, a bit of foregrounding should suffice.
At the Expo, there are various pins representing different pavilions, countries, organizations, and themes in general. Many of these pins are traded and collected between Expo employees, including pavilion workers, volunteers, bus drivers, even upper level management. Different pins have different values depending on how sought after they are, how rare they are, and so on and so on. The entire pin trading/collecting dynamic becomes a big bargaining process, not unlike shopping in the streets of Shanghai. More often than not it's not just a one-for-one deal. 2 pins for 1. 5 pins for 2. 3 pins for 6. You get the idea. It's all subjective to a certain extent. Different pins are of different worth and significance to different people. The craze with which this phenomenon has hit people is remarkable. It's gotten to a point where I try not to wear my badge when I don't have to (the lanyard holds the pins people own, like a trophy around their necks) because I see glints and stares out of the corner of my eye. I for one do not care for pin trading since there are none that I so covet. I mean, I'm more than happy to take a pin when someone offers it, but there's never a pin that warrants me approaching someone in order to initiate a trade. Bleh.

Since taking this photo my pin collection has grown through people's generosity.

USA Pavilion pins.

On another note, there are tidbits of California that I miss. I miss driving and my car. I miss the nice balance between suburbia and urban-ness (though ONLY at times--am I really admitting this?) I miss great weather. Oh, the mild, pleasurable climate that only LA can harbor. I miss Chipotle. I miss my family. I miss clubbing with my girls. I miss shopping in malls with rows of recognizable labels and clothes I'm fashionably comfortable with wearing. I miss wasting hours playing Big 2 and drinking milk tea. I miss having private space, namely a bubble around me that people usually don't penetrate that is violated here the second I step into any public area. I could go on and on because there are tons of things I miss, but right now there's no other place I'd rather be than here. It's proven to be an awesome experience so far.

New SEZ in China and Haibao's Market Power

The Chinese government is planning to make Kashgar in the Xinjiang region a special economic zone. The move is probably as much, if not more so, political than economic.
http://www.eeo.com.cn/ens/Politics/2010/07/23/176357.shtml

Tidbits
I find myself slowly losing English language ability even as it has been a week since I landed in Shanghai.

I think our apartment has very thin ceilings because I constantly hear running water when someone upstairs turns on the faucet. But that beats a few days ago when every 5 seconds there was a thump-thump-thump-thump sound in its place.

I think 海寶 is starting to grow on me. I used to think he was one ugly creature but his pervasive presence in the city forces me to take multiple good looks at him...and I suppose he's kind of endearing. Maybe he should stay a permanent mascot for Shanghai. It would make sense to leave all the 海寶-shaped bushes and posters intact rather than tearing them down once the Expo is over. I'm tempted to send 海寶 memorabilia to family and friends back in the States, but they'd probably be like WTF? What is this thing? But he's popular here. Loads of people are walking around carrying the signature 海寶 plush doll. 50 RMB!


海寶 says bye bye for now.

Here We Go

Let's see how long I can keep this up. Blogging about adventures in China is hard when one must simultaneously be out making adventures. In the 6 days I've been here, I've visited the following pavilions:
USA
Kazakhstan
Egypt
South Korea
Hong Kong
Pakistan
Africa

Here's one I have yet to visit, but should soon. The China Pavilion.

The Expo Village I have mixed feelings about. On the one hand it's really cool when you do run into people from other countries, because more often than not they're super friendly and will at least give you a smile and a nod if not engage in conversation. On the other hand, it's so underpopulated I wonder how many people actually live there. It's easy to take a stroll and literally not run into anyone the entire time. Another upside is definitely the swankiness of the spaces and amenities. I don't know how others are treated, but they definitely went all out for us American kids. By Chinese standards anyway.

Whee. There's a bar right downstairs too.


And here's a video of the place. Mind you, I am not a professional cameraman, so you'll have to bear with the shaky and ill-shot clip.

This Program is brought to you in part by...

Mmm. My sister bought it for my birthday and I tried it on for the first time today. So feminine. Flowery. Fresh. I'm falling in love with my own scent...

Family Above All Else

Is is possible to be homesick when one hasn't left home yet? I wonder how much more quiet the house will be without a fourth person...

Slizzard.

Slizzard: One who has consumed alcohol and is either tipsy or fully intoxicated and showing signs of the alcohol. From urban dictionary.

=)

Reason #98956895789647 and 98956895789648 I love my mom.

I saw her this morning wearing a pair of earrings I had intended to donate to the Vietnam Veterans of America. She had fished through the bags and found them, in addition to a Dunder Mifflin bag I never used. When I asked her about the earrings she beamed and said, "Aren't they cute!"

Teaching my mom how to use a computer and download files. It is quite an experience.

Suburban Birds.

Today my brother and I sat outside in our backyard for about 20 minutes to see if birds would come and eat the bread crumbs we put out. They did not. Stupid birds. If these were urban LA birds they'd be all over that.

My brother told me sometimes my dad throws handfuls of of my mom's grains for the birds when he comes home from work. My mom doesn't know. I think he's trying to slowly get rid of it because he hates eating that stuff.

5 Things I have Been Doing Instead of What I'm Supposed to Be Doing

#1 One of my all time favorite loves. Making collages. It took me the entire night but didn't feel like it. Will I regret it tomorrow? Yes. Why? Because now this means I got NOTHING done for my professor. But it's pretty. Teehee. I'm taking a picture of it now because once Linda leaves I will probably not get a chance to see my creation again. And I'm not afraid to post it here because the chances that she'll come across this blog is 0.0001%.
Downside: My computer, desk, and room in general now looks like a glitter cloud exploded.


#2 I found mysoju.com. I started watching 這裡發現愛 (Wish to See you Again). In terms of the storyline, it's ok. 還好. But I always get excited when I see scenes filmed at locations in Taipei I recognize or have been to. There's one scene in episode 3 where Michelle Chen walks out of a party. No other place but Room 18, right down to the black/red exterior and funky-cool sinks in the wraparound bathroom. Taipei's only so big, meaning there's only so many appropriate locations you can film. The same feeling occurs when I see UCLA pop up in popular media. Result of my recent rekindling with 偶像劇? No sleep until 3 AM, which makes for a very lazy Brandy the next day. Rargh. I keep telling myself I will break the pattern of unhealthy sleeping time...but it's almost 2 AM and look what I'm doing right now...


#3 A new-found obsession with yelping. Not that I didn't use Yelp before--I did a lot to find new places, but I've acquired this sudden interest in writing reviews. Every time I come back from a new place there is this irresistible desire within me to go on Yelp and recite my experiences. I find myself almost wanting to go to new places just so I can review them. What is this? Is there a name for this? Is it a syndrome?

#4 Thinking about aging. And how much I hate it. Yes, it is now approximately 2 weeks before my 24th birthday. How old that sounds. 24. 24. 24. 24. I liked the number better when it was just a popular TV action series. Or Kobe Bryant's jersey number. To a female such as myself, 24 screams 6 years away from 30. Inching toward the next 40 (if I'm lucky) years of my life that can most likely be characterized as mundane, less-than-glamorous, and more preoccupied with making ends meet than finding means to an end. If that makes any sense. Is it bad that I'm beginning to get this inkling of an urge to lie about my age?

#5 Cooking. Anyone who knows me knows that me + kitchen = a good probability for disaster. But since moving back home I've concocted a number of things that have yet to end in substantial disaster. Teriyaki chicken wings, BBQ glazed ribs, pasta. At worse they've been meh. At best they've actually been edible and even...dare I say it...good? There's this miso-ginger salmon recipe sitting on my desktop waiting to be put into action. Maybe there is hope for me after all! Tomorrow I tackle noodle soup with shrimp and fish balls, per mom's request.


PS What I'm supposed to be doing, only Buddha knows. I think it involved an assemblage of research, contacting professors in Shanghai and other interviewees, finding data, working on a book project, or some sort of combination involving all of the above? Hrm...

Angular Momentum

Ughhhhhhh

Living at home so far, is proving to be a NOT pleasant experience.

Moving Pains

Moving back to good ol' West Covina at the end of this week. Goodbye Culver City. Goodbye lively LA. You've been good to me. I will definitely miss the hustle and bustle of the city. I hope I'm not doing myself a wrong by trading urban vibrancy for suburban sleepiness. Ooh.

Time to Get my Shit Together

I just realized I've been acting pretty recklessly since school let out...I really haven't gotten as far as I've wanted on reading and writing and work, and I only have myself to blame for it. It's embarrassing to discover that at a time in my life when I am supposed to be getting my act together, I spend an entire Saturday recovering from a hangover...I just hope it won't get to the point where I end up disappointing people who I'm obligated to, both on a professional and personal level.
I really need to get my shit together. Here's to working hard for the next few weeks.

Vainglory Be Gone!

I've been extra vain lately. Gotta keep myself in check.

How it Feels to Live in a Country with Regressive Policies

People who complain about illegal immigrants should keep in mind that at one point or another anyone who came to the good ol' US of A was illegal.
Legality is a construct that has been politically defined and institutionalized by those who have power and interests in maintaining the status quo.
EDUCATE YOURSELVES PEOPLE!

Amazing.

A Blog about Missing Asia

These are so cute.
I saw them everywhere in Taiwan. Too bad I can't get it for myself, but maybe I will give them as a gift to one of the many couples in my life, hehe. That's one of the things I miss about Asia--cute gadgets and things that are hard to find here.

Other things I miss about Asia are bento (just in the case of Japan) and boxed lunches !yum yum!, public transportation, and cheap salon visits. I am not ashamed to admit one of the reasons I look forward to going to China this year is so I can get my hair permanently straightened at 1/10 the price I would pay here.

I'm getting pretty excited. Unfortunately there's a more pressing matter that requires my attention--this final I'm taking in two days that I have to study for right now. SIGH.

Rargh

Scratch that last post. I am so over it. And yes, I am BIPOLAR. It's one of my qualities. Bah!

jkhgkdfgjkfldgjklfdjgdlfgjlk

好消息。 我好像徹底忘掉當初那個傷害我的人以及那個被放棄痛苦的感覺。
壞消息。 怎麼忘掉的方法是去想另外一個人呢？ WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 還偏偏是一個難搞， 過於自信，不誠實， 不能相信， 奇怪的人。 我是怎麼了？ 每一次都把自己陷在莫名奇妙的狀況。

我現在真的迫不及待趕快去上海。 如果每一次遇到難題能逃去另外一個國家， 那就好了。

Existentialism, Feminism, and Potato Balls

Sartre and Simone de Beauvoir were lifetime lovers with polyamorous practices. Setting aside their less-than-virtuous lifestyles, some of the things they said really can make you think. Maybe this is some food for thought. Maybe it's gibberish bullcrap. But if you can fathom it, it is one interesting perspective on the purpose of man's existence.

Sartre the existentialist is quite different than the existentialism we know today with the substance beat out of it until nothing is left but BS. Most famous is probably his idea of "existence preceding essence." Man’s purpose is determined after he is created and born. Before giving meaning to himself, he simply is. Contrary to religions heralding a higher order, man has no predetermined reason to exist. Contrary to theories about human nature, man has no universally definitive essence. What he eventually chooses for himself after he enters the world becomes his being, or his essence.
There is nothing necessarily valid about a universally shared experience of existence. Existence is a subjective experience. Man wills himself to be something, and this something is not universally shared. When man makes his own experience and determines his own purpose, it is a subjective act. His experience is unique to himself, shared with no one else. This contradicts the idea of a universal truth. There is no essential truth. Individual experience is the universal truth.
Contrary to what others charge against existentialism, it is an optimistic outlook on human existence. It is optimistic because it allows for the possibility of complete unrestraint in action and grants complete agency to the individual. On the other hand, theories about human nature are pessimistic because they bind man to a structure, a set of constraints, that will subsequently determine how one can act.
Although insightful, I can't quite see eye to eye with the way he dismisses the poor, sad, and decrepit conditions one is born into. I cannot help but think Sartre is being a bit disingenuous when he talks about “every man realiz[ing] himself in realizing a type of humanity.” (Sartre, Existentialism is a Humanism) He has this perspective because he is a European living in a time period that privileges Europeans. “Every purpose, even that of a Chinese, an Indian, or a Negro, can be understood by a European.” (ibid) Can it really? Their experiences are vastly different. It is arrogant, when one comes from a position of privilege, to say that this is the circumstances you were born into, don’t question it. Deal with it.

That makes me feel better. Anything I do from here on out will be my personal value judgment in regards to how I think the world I live in should be. And if I can't deal with a crappy situation, I can relegate my behavior to self-deception and hence avoid the anguish that comes with total responsibility and agency.

De Beauvoir is also an interesting character. Her idea of women as the second sex conceptualizes gender relations in a different way than how we might traditionally think of it, namely as an oppositional dynamic. Firstly, the definition of femininity can never be mentioned without discussing its relation to the conception of the other sex, masculinity. Femininity, as it stands, only has relevance relative to masculinity—it can never stand as an objective definition on its own. “A man never begins by presenting himself as an individual of a certain sex; it goes without saying that he is a man.” (de Beauvoir, The Second Sex) Woman, on the other hand, is presented as everything man is not.
In actuality, man and woman are not polar opposites, but positives and negatives, respectively. What is more interesting is de Beauvoir’s idea that man is the “neutral,” or the default. He represents, at once, the primary and the basic. He is the “absolute human type.” (ibid) Masculinity is the embodiment of “a direct and normal connection with the world,” whereas the female is not because of the particular biological qualities she possesses and simultaneously, the attributes she lacks. (ibid)
Just a dose of de Beauvoir.

Do you see anything wrong with the fact that the entire female population, on average, makes 77 cents to a man's dollar? I do. And if you do, then you're a feminist. There's nothing wrong with being a feminist. Most feminists are not bra-burning, obscenities-shouting, man-hating she-males. It's a little more subtle than that. If you value equality, if you feel that there is nothing inherent that makes men more superior earners, if you feel that the empowerment of women can only do good for the societies in which they live, then you are a feminist, and you should wear the badge with pride.

Gosh I love Porto's potato balls. Potato-ey, meaty, greasy, fried goodness. And lavender honey ice cream. Oh, the woes of balancing good food with a good figure. Sometimes I feel it's a tradeoff.

My Oasis

Don't you just want to run through this? I do. <3 tulips.

Beautiful People Rule the World?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/14/heidi-montags-10-plastic_n_423855.html
I know this is old news in the world of celebritydom, but I came across Heidi Montag's controversial plastic surgery overkill while deciding to take a break from reading Weber.
Ok, honestly, she looked perfectly fine before the liposuction, Botox injections, lifts, and augmentations. It's ridiculous. The more images I saw of her on Google, the stupider I thought this girl was. She's spent thousands of dollars, suffered avoidable pain, gone beyond recognizability. If I was her mom, I would cry. "Why don't I recognize my beautiful daughter anymore?" And has it done much for her physical appearance? The answer to me, at least, is no. If I saw both Heidi's on the street, I would think the same thing: that's an attractive blonde. I certainly hope it's done something for her immense insecurity, because that's where this entire mess seems to stem from. I also heard a segment on NPR recently about how more attractive people have better chances of moving up the career ladder and being promoted in the workplace. I was going to try to find the piece, but got too lazy. Point of the story was, if you are physically attractive the potential to get far in your career is there over someone who is "average."
It just made me realize how shallow of a society we've become. Especially when you live in LA, you only have a few seconds most of the time to impress the opposite sex. How do you distinguish yourself from the hottie next to you to a guy you're interested in? By out-primping, out-pinching, out-exercising, out-plumping, out-beautifying over other girls. Maybe there is this 'race to the top' to see who can be the most beautiful, earn the most admirers, and swoon the most people. I'm really talking from a female's perspective. This might apply to guys too but I think males get a lot more leeway when it comes to points on physical appearance. I can't deny that I'm guilty of the same crime. I spend a lot of time thinking about how I look to the opposite sex, about what parts of my physical appearance needs work, about what outfits flatter my figure and what doesn't. I'm surrounded by beautiful people--at school, at clubs, at the gym--it can really make you think about whether you're up to par with people's standards of beauty. There are days when I feel like I can conquer the world, days where I feel super confident about myself. Then there are days when my self esteem droops and I just feel like an ugly duckling. Those are the days when I think about what's wrong with myself physically. I know, it's sad. I know, I shouldn't be thinking about these things. But I can't pretend that I don't have insecurities, like 99.9% of the people on this planet.
Here's a thought, and Dr. Seuss couldn't have said it better.
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
Why does it matter what other people think outside of the ones you care about? It's unquantifiable, but I don't want to look back and think, wow, why did I spend all that time trying to impress a person who doesn't remotely matter to or care about me? I guess one could argue it's human nature to want a plethora of admirers and envious people, but human nature can also be cannibalism and bestiality.
And I've come to realize something else among all this--that the times where I feel most beautiful is when I feel good about myself inside. Maybe that's the more important thing I need to work on--confidence that will stay with me after my face and figure start to sag. What a horrible thought, actually. BUT, next time when I think about whether a dress looks good on me and what other people might think of it, maybe I should spend that energy thinking about how I can better myself as a person. I think for most people the key to outer beauty is to channel the beauty you feel from within. Let that radiate, and people will naturally see and feel it. I hardly think that requires a nose or boob job as a prerequisite.

A Great Cause

I usually don't use my blog for promotional purposes. But this is worth the money. Wokai is an American-based NGO that lends money, from user donations, to rural entrepreneurs and families in China to start their businesses. After your donation is repaid you can choose to reinvest it toward new people who need it. Yes, it's microfinance. Yes, the repayment rate is super high (check out the website). Yes, it's legit. And yes, it's EMPOWERING.

I donated $50, but you can make a contribution as small as $10. It will make a difference!
http://www.wokai.org/

Self Pity is Despicable

I'm going to be single forever. I just know it. Maybe I should get a dog.

The World...where's it going?

Earthquakes.
Sweatshop labor.
Suicides.
War and innocent civilians.
Budget cuts in the UC system...both my undergrad majors are now defunct.
Nietzsche.

Just a few of the things getting me down this week.

Almost...but not yet

I was going to make this entry a 'spill-my-guts over how I've been feeling' one, but I waited too long and now I'm just too lazy to say what I think. It'll be for another time...when the feelings are more than fleeting.

I made a March Madness bracket, let's see how it turns out. A monkey probably could have made one and it would be almost as random as mine. This is someone who has not at all followed college basketball this season and made picks mostly according to seed number. Obviously that is not the best indicator of anything.

Wow, why can't every week be spring break? I can't believe it's Friday already. Good things come to an end all too quickly. I guess this week was sort of a trial run for how it will be living at home next year. It was bearable, except I had a random moment today when my mom complained that I never tell her anything that's going on in my life. I found that kind of funny, because I've been so much more open than I was when I was younger. And I don't like telling people, parents, friends, whoever, everything. I still enjoy privacy, for all it's worth.

Back to where it all began

I don't actually think going to Shanghai this summer will help me establish contacts in the way my parents think it will. But I'm still going. I need to do some soul-searching. I need a time out. I need a hideaway from excess baggage. Taiwan, it's been done. I love(d) Taiwan, but maybe I'm running away from things associated with it. Maybe in a few years...

I got an ominous sounding email from a professor. It's probably nothing much, but it's kind of ruined my spring break. I can't stop thinking about what it could possibly be...

No Title

Stuck in some places I can't get out of.

Goodnight, World

This week was one of the longest and most tiring ever. I probably got a combined 25 hours of sleep, coupled with tons of grading and mounds of reading that needed to get done in basically, one night. I had to tell myself being tired was psychological at times. 25 hours is so little for me! I really wonder how I did it in college when 5, 6 hours a night was the norm. It didn't help that I've been plagued with allergies and nasal congestion this entire week. I had to resort to a Red Bull. Blech! I usually try to stay away from that stuff.
I thought it was funny when I ran into my counselor and the first thing he said was, "Have you been eating? You look so thin," to which I responded, "No, I've just been feeling under the weather. Do I look that bad?" His answer was classic: "No, you just look more model-esque now." I'll take a compliment, even if it is a backhanded one.

Sleep, you are beautiful. I can always count on you to make me happy. Tomorrow, I will conquer the world. But tonight, I will charge my batteries.

Quote of the Day

"Specialists are those who learn more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing. Generalists, on the other hand, learn less and less about more and more until they know nothing about everything." (Benjamin Cohen, International Political Economy: An Intellectual History, 2008)

Interesting quote!

Golden Summer

Looking at the summer...and realizing I need to start saving up like...NOW! Who's down for Taiwan/Korea this summer? Let me know!

Shut up, You don't know what you're talking about.

I hate arguing with ignorant people. GOD. It is pointless to argue with someone, with absolutely no personal experience, who is perfectly content to apply nonsensical and questionable generalizations to people whom they do not know, and moreover, have never even met. Is that fair? Is it? Would you like to be judged by someone who doesn't know you, but thinks they do due to a set of observations that while may be true for some people in your demographic category, is not applicable to you?

Yeah, I didn't think so. Screw talking to walls.

Haiti

When nature strikes, it forsakes no one. Hoping for the people of Haiti's survival and revival. I can't help but think, Los Angeles is on a fault line similar to Haiti's. What if something this devastating was to strike our city as well? God forbid.
I am thinking of and praying for you Haiti.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/15/world/americas/15haiti.html?hp

Text 'Haiti' to 90999 to donate $10 for the relief effort.
Or donate here. http://www.yele.org/

Instead of Working...

I love gummy bears!

Decisions, Decisions

The decisions we have to make in life sometimes can be quite devastating on our spirits and hearts. But it must be done.

2010. It's going to be my year.